Life Unexpected

A year ago today my life changed forever.  John and I together saw the first glimpse of our baby girl.  Now, granted at the time we did not know it was going to be a girl, but even just at 7 weeks pregnant, seeing that little blob confirming that there was life inside of me was one of the most amazing experiences ever.  We could not hear the heart beat yet, but we could see it.  I knew my life was going to change forever, but I could never have fully anticipated just how much.

Let me back up a few years.  John and I had everything all planned out.  We were going to move to Campbellsville for me to work on my masters, then I would find a job, get established at the church, and then, maybe a year or so after that, we would start a family.  Little did we know at the time God had other plans.

I was perfectly fine with this plan for a while, or at least I tried to convince myself it was for the best.  Then it seemed like everyone around me started to get pregnant or have babies.  I felt like I couldn't get on Facebook without reading about someone else who was announcing the big news that they were expecting.  Please do not get me wrong; I was extremely happy for all of those people.  But my heart would start to ache with that same longing.  I wanted to be a mom, even though logically it made sense to wait.

As I already said, God had other plans.  We were both surprised the day the pregnancy test was positive.  And it did not really click until that first ultrasound, and even then it took a while for me to realize that there was a life, my daughter, growing inside of me.  I know everyone experiences pregnancy differently, but I absolutely loved it, even with the complications I had at the end causing me to deliver a few weeks early.

I love being a mom.  I love watching Kaylee grow and  experience the world around her with complete awe and wonder.  It is amazing watching how she changes everyday and becomes more aware of her surroundings.  I know that I am not new to these feelings, but it sure has been fun experiencing them first hand.

Kaylee has been with us for almost five months, and I cannot imagine our lives without her, and I cherish every breath she breathes.  There are too many wonderful women who struggle to get pregnant or are not able to at all, or mom's who have to say goodbye to their babies before they are even born or only after getting to spend a short time with them.  I have been close to several situations like this, and each one makes me value the life of my daughter even more.  None of us are promised tomorrow, so I want to make sure I take in every moment I get to have with my child and thank God for her everyday.

A year ago today my life changed forever.  I hope I have many more years to enjoy this change, and hopefully many other changes as well.  Thank you, God, for the blessing of being a mommy.